An Average Day
by sexy-jess
Summary: Just an average day in the life of a Dark Lord. Alternate Universe. One-Shot.


An average day in the life of a Dark Lord

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"My loyal and mossst respected followersss, the time hasss come in which we find we will be triumphant! We will not ssstop our mission in defeating Potter and dessstroying the filth that hasss overtaken our World, the filth that you mussst live in! They expect us to hide, perhapsss to even keep quiet, but will we do this? NO! We will continue in our plansss! We will persssevere in continuing purity!"

The crowd of Death Eaters stood silently, some felt the need to applaud, and some did not. They obeyed orders, and their main orders were to not speak unless spoken to – supposedly, this made the Dark Lord feel more respected and powerful.

What were they to do next? They were hungry for death, torture and the adrenaline of it all.

The Dark Lord paused for effect as he stood in the unsurprisingly dimly-lit room. Once again he went into an epic speech of the purity that must be withheld in the magical community – this was always part of his speech, something he said at every meeting.

After ten more minutes of listening about the disgusting muggle-loving Albus Dumbledore and Harry Potter, he was just starting to mention the rest of the polluted muggle world, when a most common and yet peculiar noise was heard; the noise of someone apparating and/or disapparating.

For the commonality of this sound, it was quite startling that someone should enter the domain in which only those who followed the Dark Lord knew about, a hidden castle just outside of Holstebro in Denmark. It was unheard of for someone to enter in the middle of a meeting.

On a less related topic, the Dark Lord had four hidden castles in Denmark, one of which was used only for his strange obsession with muggle Lego. Unknown to his followers he spent many days building Lego replicas of Hogwarts, Muggle and Magical communities; and then took immense joy out of destroying those life-like structures.

Back to the story.

The room seemed as if it was ensconced in shadow and no one moved.

Silence.

More silence.

Not a single noise, no breath, no shifting of feet. The Death Eaters were _indeed_ discreet. But the tension was so thick you could blast it with a simple spell.

At last, a lower Death Eater, by the name of Rupert Green, stepped forward, raised his wand and whispered an incantation, for light-more light than they already had.

"_Lumos!" _

The bright light shone from his wand and he saw that every one of his companions had their wands in front of them, searching the room and ready for an attack. But there was no sign of anyone having appeared or disappeared.

The assembled group turned to their master, who was eyeing a very odd and bizarre happening. Right in front of the entire ensemble, a black orb floated about the height of an average man's shoulders.

The black orb floated for what felt like ages. The seconds seemed minutes, the minutes seemed hours and the hours seemed days. But as all over-reactions go, the orb only floated for 1 minute and 36 seconds before it gave out a cackling evil laugh and burst into flame.

The flame seemed to heat the entire room, it seemed to burn every single being and it was like a furnace. Yet no-one was harmed.

And then, it was gone, and all that was left was a single green piece of parchment, floating in the exact same place as the black orb, folded neatly into a square, with a golden ribbon wrapped around it.

The Dark Lord reached out one of his boney hands, grabbing the parchment out of the air; this single parchment holding his entire concentration.

The tension had yet again become thick.

As he unfolded the parchment and slowly began to read, his loyal follower's thoughts swirled with mystery. What could be so important to interrupt their meeting? Was it expected? No, certainly not.

A large, sardonic smile graced the Dark Lord's face.

'_Perfect.'_He thought maliciously.

"Well…. It sssseems asss if the order for our new robesss isss ready."

There was movement to the left of the room as a Death Eater stood forward. Lowering his mask, Lucius Malfoy's face was alight in eagerness. He looked to his Dark Lord as if asking permission to speak.

"Yessss Luciusss?"

"My Lord," he bent down on one knee, eyes to the ground, "May I be the first in testing these robes?" his request seemed to reverberate around the minds of his peers.

Narrowing eyes and clenching a fist the Dark Lord declined.

"My loyal follower, asss your Lord, I will be the firssst."

Lucius closed his eyes in defeat, never one to go against his master.

The Dark Lord then proceeded to tap his wand on the parchment and whisper an unknown incantation.

In an instant the room was filled with brown boxes with 'Madam Malkin's' imprinted on the sides. Stepping forward the Dark Lord took a robe from one of the boxes.

Moments later his dark and brooding robes were replaced with a soft silk green fabric which showed off his figure.

Conjuring a mirror and turning before it, the Dark Lord seemed pleased at his appearance.

"Well? What do you think Luciusss?"

Stumbling over his words, Lucius Malfoy's face opened in an uncharacteristic smile.

"I think, My Lord, that the shade of green compliments your eyes. They do look particularly fierce in your new robes. In fact, it's very frightening to look at. Please forgive me if I glance away every so often."

The Dark Lord nodded his head, and then turned to another of his followers.

"My dearessst Bella, what do you think?"

A dark figure threw its head back and cackled.

"Oh My Lord you look pleasantly vicious! Does my robe come with little bows at the wrist and collar too?"

"Crucio!"

Bellatrix Lestrange screamed and writhed upon the floor until her Lord was merciful enough to stop.

"You have been told Bella, that asss the DARK LORD", he spat these words ferociously; "only I will have bowsss! Your robesss mussst look plain compared to mine!"

"Ye-yes my Lord." She stuttered her reply, clearly trying to dispel the effect of the cruciatus curse.

For the rest of the day and well into the evening, the Death Eaters tried on their new robes and complimented the Dark Lord. There was a little more insulting Potter and Dumbledore, but you've heard it all before, so it isn't worth any mention.

That night the Dark Lord slept with a smile on his face.

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Word Count: 1097  
Okay, I admit it, I'm bored and crazy. Not a good combination!

But I just hate the thought of the Dark Lord and his followers wearing black robes which obviously aren't tailored. I thought this would be a bit of fun to read.


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